choke on that causality

Why is that when you call customer service, before you can talk to a real person, you are forced to navigate though various prompts and nested menus with what seems like never ending questions. But when you are finally transferred to that customer service representative, what is the first thing they say, “How can I help you?” Do they really have no access to the information you just gave them in those damn menus??? Fuck that. What is the god damn point.

One time we went to the Verizon Wireless store, and they told us we had to stop at one of the kiosks to fill out some various information about why we were there, and our name and stuff, and after all that, we still had to dictate all the same damn info to one of the reps. Bull shit. I’m tired of it.

I really hate the following words and phrases. I’m not quite sure why. Some of them I probably just don’t like them because people I don’t like say them quite often. Others are way overused especially at work. Others are just plain stupid.

Theoretically
In Theory
Moot Point
For All Intents and Purposes
Essentially
Going Forward
Retrospect
Paradigm
Low-hanging fruit
Unencumbered
Criteria
Epiphany
Synergy
Formality

Yesterday I saw someone at work who still had the size sticker on their brand new pair of pants. Hilarious. I didn’t know him though…so I just stared and laughed instead of telling him.

At work when people are Out of the Office for one reason or another, we send all day free meeting notices to each other so other people know you will gone. I just think it is funny cause I always used to just get ones with the subject “OOO”. Don’t know why that has always struck me as funny. I often get ones for “Therapy”. What is the first think you think of when you see that word…I know it is physical therapy…but I always picture a shrink.

So I have a poison ivy rash on my knees and arms from weeding and mulching the other day I assume. It sucks. An no, it isn’t contagious like a lot of people think. You only get it where the plant oil touched your skin. The oil is long gone now…I’m just itchy.

It was so sunny and beautiful outside just a little bit ago. So what did I do. I decided to move the patio furniture and chairs and put some towels down on the deck and lay out in the sun….guess what happened…that’s right folks. As soon as I laid down, the mother of all clouds hovered above me blocking out all hope of sun. Fuck. Well rather than get (too) upset, I decided to do the next best thing. I went to the tanning salon. So there ya go. Big ol’ middle finger to you mother nature!

Last night I laid down for what I thought was going to be a disco nap, but it turned into an all-nighter. I must have been really tired.

I guess not much has been going on in my world lately. I moved to a cubicle next to a window recently at work. I feel special. Oh and I got an award for doing a good job externalizing an application server. A $50 gas card. I thought that was cool.

Sammy and KC are as annoying as ever. Love em to death…but it is getting harder and harder to walk them. I bought a new leash that has a rubber grip on it, so my hand no longer gets burned…but it is still a huge workout to walk them. I’m thinking about taking them both to obedience classes. Sammy is on some medication now to get rid of his parasites. Hopefully he’ll get a clean test here in another couple of weeks. If he stops eating dirt and licking water off the deck that is…

I’m trying to patch up some missing grass areas outside. But now I have a feeling that wherever Sammy has chosen to pee now will be the new bare spots.

Yesterday I was outside weeding and mulching in the front yard. The neighbor arrived home and got out of his car and complimented me on my work. He said it was looking really good. Then he told me sarcastically that I was really going to ‘love’ those cottonwood trees. Then I said, uh, we moved here in May of last year…so we remember the snow-like cotton fall that was going on when we were moving in. Anyhow. Then he asked me if I was into basketball. Uh, no. Then he started blabbing on about some team he liked and that the games don’t come on til 10pm. ok… Well just when I thought it hadn’t gotten awkward enough, he decided to start taking down the christmas lights he had on his bushes…yeah it is May. I know it’s tragic. Had he not noticed those were there. Thank god I ran out of mulch…so I ran away and didn’t come back for awhile. I sooo never have anything in common with most people, and I’d really just rather not deal with them.